Monday, December 17, 2012

EXCLUSIVE: TRANSFORMERS 4 Script Leaked; Villain is Unicron

EXCLUSIVE: TRANSFORMERS 4 Script Leaked; Villain is Unicron

Close the blinds and dim the lights, because we have a super secret leak on our hands! Thanks to one of our sources in the field, we’ve nabbed the latest copy of Michael Bay’s TRANSFORMERS 4 script (a hefty, robot filled 120 pages of explosions and awesomeness). I can’t give you any specifics about our source, fearing that he may lose his job, but he works in a “secure document disposal” firm, and it just so happened that a copy of the latest Bayformers script (revised on 11/30/2012) came across his path.  After some hours of research, we think this is a legitimate copy (thought we can’t be certain), so we’re really stoked to share it with you… but don’t kill us if we’re wrong.
Before you read any further, I should warn you… the following is pretty spoiler – tastic, so proceed with caution.
Now that the obligatory caveat is out of the way, let’s dive into the meat and potatoes. As the titles of the article so carelessly states, Unicron is the new threat, along with his flunkies.

He’s like Galactus, but with metal wings
The script begins 4 years after DARK OF THE MOON, in the midst of yet another destructive meteor storm. The opening is very much like the other films, with a generic “crisis montage”.  All the major news networks are scrambling to cover the event, fearing that another alien attack is on its way.
Cut to a giant metal space ball, hurtling through the atmosphere, landing right beside Stonehenge. It creates a cylindrical portal and launches an unseen entity into another dimension. As you can imagine, this agitates pretty much everyone, and the Autobots assemble to figure out what the hell is going on.

This is Primus… Unicron killer and all around good guy
Eventually we discover that this giant ball is actually a space ship, designed by an ancient Autobot known as Vector Prime. He’s the guardian of Primus, the one being in the universe that can defeat the planet eating Transformer, and main villain, Unicron. So, Optimus and a handful of Autobots have a grand ol’ time hanging out with Vector Prime, trying to locate Primus.
Meanwhile, Unicron’s flunkies, led by Galvatron, attack a super secret government base in Colorado. This place is important for two reasons
1) It houses Decepticon Corpses (including Megatron)
2) It’s the home of a brand new array of Cybertronian-Earth weapons and armor suits. Imagine Iron Man, but sexier and crazier.
Anyway, Galvatron destroys the installation, plugs into the Decepticon bodies in order to download their memories, and in the process he becomes possessed by Megatron. Yeah… that guy’s back in action.
Oh… and when the base is completely destroyed, one human character (Josie/Circuit Breaker) crawls to safety, but in order to survive, she initiates some weird robotic surgery, and transforms herself into a kickass cyborg.
As you’d expect, there are a handful of other human characters tossed into the mix. There’s a Special Ops Sergeant (Beller) who seems perfectly crafted for Mark Wahlberg, a few reckless kids (Beller’s teenage daughter and her race car driving boyfriend) in the style of Shia Labouf and Megan Fox, but sadly no John Turturro cameo.
I don’t want to bore you with the nitty bitty parts of the script, even though there are a fair share of interesting points before it concludes. Here are the bullet points:
  • Optimus, Vector Prime, and a handful of Autobouts travel to Mount St. Hellen on the day of its eruption in order to retrieve Primus from Space & Time… or at least I think that’s what they’ve done. Galvatron/Megatron attacks them, revealing himself to Optimus, and craziness unfolds
  • They return to the present in order to defend the portal at Stonehenge against Megatron and his Unicron flunkies, in an attempt to survive long enough to ensure Primus’s return
  • Josie/Circuit Breaker goes on a wild binge of Transformer murders, unable to distinguish between Autobots and Decepticons because she’s so damn pissed off, having almost been killed.
  • Eventually Josie joins forces with the Autobots.
  • As the climatic battle unfolds, with Unicron drawing closer to Earth, a group of Dinobots jump through the portal to assist Optimus. Yeah, I said it… DINOBOTS!
  • Unicron arrives, transforming the planet into a mechanical sphere reminscent of Cybertron, but he never gets a chance to finish.
  • Primus finally makes his debut. He defeats Unicron, kicks that baddie’s soul out of his gigantic metal body, and creates a new planet out of the corpse, perfectly fit for the Autobots.
  • In the midst of Unicron’s defeat, Optimus kills Megatron/Galvatron, and all ends well. Kinda. The closing shot reveals Galvatron’s secluded ship, hovering in space, with two bright red eyes shining from within. DUN DUN DUN!
Overall, the film seems like another Michael Bay affair. Nothing spectacular, but nothing terrible, either. Expect to see robots smashing each others faces into bolts and gaskets, a few doses of annoying teenage drama, and some small bits of wit.
What do you guys think? Is this absolutely terrible? Or somewhat better than the last offering?

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